People in People.

I'm deeply frustrated with one of my friends who tells just about everything to my sister and tells her not to tell me half of it. It kind of really hurts my feelings since a] I thought we were better friends than that and b] I told him how it bothers me that he isn't telling me stuff and he said it wasn't fair on and blahblahblah and carries on with it. He's also just being an idiot with a lot of things and making me worry. SUCH A GUY. What really irritates me the most is that I cannot stay mad at him because I'm worried about him and staying mad wouldn't help in the first place and seeing him be all happy makes me feel relieved. RIDICULOUS. RANDOM YELLING OVER THE INTERNET.

I don't know why I was and am so upset about what he did. A lot of people do that. I was thinking it over as I was talking to a friend this weekend about the issue I have about it, and I realized it's probably because I thought he was about that and I just thought to highly of him to start with. There are just too many sides to one person and seeing so much more of this is making me a bit dizzy. I don't know whether or not to like him less for this, but I still care about him either way.

In the simplest terms I can put it, before this week, I saw him in a 'third-level' aspect in my mind. It's how I specify how close I am to someone. First, to me, is skimming the surface of things, second is being acquaintances that make good small talk, and third is really know the person on the side they wish to show you. But it's not quite a side, it's more like a whole different person all in one person. So fourth-dimension of knowing someone is like trying to see everything physically in the fourth dimension: just mind-shatteringly confusing. It's seeing them from various angles and sides. Most of the time, when I see these other parts of the person, I really see why the person didn't want me to see that and I kind of begin distancing myself from him/her. I don't particularly want to in this situation, but the other sides of him still bother me a lot.

I SOUND STOOPUD.
But it makes sense to me.

This makes him sound awful I think, but he's really a good person. Really. I really hope.
And I made myself sound bad, but I don't care about that at all b/c I am a pretty awful person.